Praying for Adult Children

Five Ways to Start Praying for Adult Children

A friend once told me that having adult children doesn’t ease your worries at all.  In fact, she said that with your kids growing up, you’ll have a whole new set of worries to deal with!  From driving to career choices, we will always worry about our kids, no matter their age.  So as my kids have grown up and started lives of their own, I’ve learned how important praying for adult children is!

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Prayers for Wisdom

When praying for adult children, most parents ask God to give them wisdom.  We want our kids to be safe and make good choices.  We also want them to be happy with their life choices.  And we want them to be the best version of themselves.  

There are three areas to focus on when praying for wisdom for adult children.  I pray that they find the continuing education that’s right for them.   Another area I bring to God is their career choices.  And most importantly, I pray that they will all stay strong in their faith.

Praying for Adult Children’s Education

Being a mom is hard. Getting kids through schools is by far one of the hardest parts of parenting.  In fact, all of  the gray hair I just had covered up in the saloon last week was produced from getting my kids across that graduation stage!

Each of my kids had struggles and needed extra attention at times.  But my son was a huge challenge!   He spent many years doing his best to avoid schoolwork.  In fact, he would spend more time and energy avoiding it than it would have taken him to just DO it!

He gave us a little bit of a break his senior year by taking double welding, machining, and being a teacher’s assistant 2 class periods.  He loves working with his hands, so machining and welding are a perfect fit for him.  Assisting was great for him too, because he loves helping people!

I say it was only a little break because he did have to take social studies and English classes.  His teachers were a big help and worked with us to help him stay afloat, but it was still a struggle,  I’ve never been so happy to see someone graduate high school!

Praying for Adult Children
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What a Difference a Year Makes!

Fast forward a year, and my son is a totally different person.  He works at a job he loves 30-50 hours a week.  In fact, he was recently promoted as a part-time manager!  About a year ago he decided to start his welding certification classes.  His dad and I are extremely proud of the young man he is growing up to be.

It took a lot of hard work and even more prayers to get him where he is today!  We spent hours fighting to get him through school.  We would have to attend meetings and send emails constantly to keep him on track.  

Proverbs 12:14 says, “Wise words bring many benefits, and hard work brings rewards.” (NLT)  So if you have a child who’s struggling to find their way, just keep praying.  Pray that you have the wisdom to point them in the right direction.  And pray that God leads them to a career and a life where He wants them to be.

Proverbs 12:14
Proverbs 12:14

Prayers that They Have Strong Faith

As a Christian mom, my proudest days were hearing my children give the confession of Jesus as their Lord and Savior and watching them be baptized.  The anniversary of my two youngest baptisms showed up on my Timehop last week.  Seeing that post again brought back to me the joy I felt that day!

Even though my children are all Christians, I still worry about them.  I worry about all the outward influences they have in their lives.  Social media can be great, but for every positive influence, there are probably five that go against their faith.  

They each have a job.  This is great for meeting new people and learning about their different viewpoints.  But these new people might have some anti-Christian viewpoints that can lead them away from God.  

The same is true with their continuing education.   It’s good for them to meet people that aren’t like them.  I love that they are learning different viewpoints, but the influence these views might have on them is scary for me as a parent.  

There’s no way I can manage these worries on my own.  Everyday I pray for my adult children to stay true to their faith.  I also remember that Proverbs 22:6  says, “Direct your children onto the right path, and when they are older, they will not leave it.”  I have faith that with raising my children in faith, they will know God all of their lives.

Proverbs 22:6
Proverbs 22:6

Praying for Adult Children to Learn Patience

Patience is one quality needed more by everyone.  It’s also a personality characteristic almost everyone could show more often.  Praying for adult children to have patience with others will help them become more kind and show the love of Jesus to those they meet.  

We should also pray that they have patience with themselves.  Like us, our adult children need to trust God’s timing in their lives.  By leaning on Him, they can learn to be patient and content in all circumstances.

Praying for Guidance in Finding Their People

Over the past 19+ years, each of my kids has had many different friends.  Some of these people were their friends for many years.  Others were only in their lives for a very short time.  Even when these friendships were short, each of them impacted my children in some way.   Some of these friendships have continued over the years.  My oldest has a friend from middle school that lives in Florida.  They don’t see each other very often, maybe 1-2 times a year.  But whenever they are able they spend time together it’s just like old times for both of them.

A few years ago, my son had a friend that wasn’t our favorite.  This kid would stay at our house a lot, which wasn’t too bad.  At first, we just thought they were goofy teenage boys acting dumb.  But after this kid would only speak to us in “grunts” we started feeling disrespected.  

Fortunately, a few weeks later, this kid moved to another town.  After he had moved, our son told us some other things about the kid that was far worse than the rudeness.  Our son became the same sweet kid we’d been missing.  After a few days, he even told us how glad he was that this “friend” was out of the picture.  

“As iron sharpens iron, so a friend sharpens a friend,” from Proverbs 27:17 reminds us how important friendships are to our children.  So even as they grow up, praying for adult children to find good friends is important.  Asking God to bless them with friends that are good for them is important.  But equally important is praying that they can BE good friends too!

Proverbs 27:17
Proverbs 27:17

Facing Disappointments in Life

Each of us will have struggles.  These struggles often lead to disappointments.  As a parent watching our kids go through disappointments is heartbreaking.  Even when our kids are grown, knowing they are hurting hurts us too.

Having spent over 8 years with teenagers in the house, we’ve dealt with our fair share of broken hearts.    Sometimes these broken hearts healed quickly.  Whichever young adult it was bounced back and was fine in a week or two.  And at other times, the sadness continued for a while.

My youngest had a relationship that lasted most of her sophomore year of high school.  At first, this relationship seemed like a good idea. This boyfriend was raised as a Christian and came from a great family.  She was happy, so we were happy.

But a few months later, they ran into some problems.  The two of them didn’t seem to be in sync as much as they were before.  Our daughter was sad a lot, and really worried that things wouldn’t work out.  I hated seeing her so upset, but there was nothing I could do to fix it.

One evening, I guess she’d had enough heartache, and announced that she was planning to end the relationship the next day.  At first, I was confused about her decision.  I was also worried that she would be more upset when the relationship was over.  But she stood firm and told us it was time to move on.

This Was a Proud Parent Moment

After school the next day, she came home as a totally different person!  She was no longer anxious or worried.  We were so happy to have the old funny, sparkling, zany kid from a few months ago.

Romans 5:3 reminds me of my daughter and how she handled this relationship disappointment.  It says, “We can rejoice, too, when we run into problems and trials, for we know that they help us develop endurance.”  Yes, she dealt with some problems during this relationship.  But, I think these problems made her stronger.  They helped her develop endurance.  And they also helped her to trust God and follow His lead in her life.

Romans 5:3
Romans 5:3

Praying for Adult Children to Find Peace

As a mom, I want each of my children to find peace.  I want them to be content with the lives they have.  And most importantly, I want them to find ultimate peace that comes from their relationship with Jesus.  That’s why praying for adult children to find peace is such an important part of my daily prayer life.

Praying for Adult Children
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Teach Your Children to Find Peace through God

We’re all looking for peace.  But, most of the time we look for it in all the wrong places.  By praying for adult children to find peace, we can help them turn to God for it.

We look to our friends, our family, our jobs, and our stuff to bring us peace.  I’ve done this as much as my kids have.  If I have more friends, if people like me, then I’ll find peace and be happy. 

 Or, I might think that my family can bring me peace.  I think that if they would stop arguing, I’d have more peace.  I also think of everything they should be doing to help me, instead of what God wants me to do for them.

Sometimes I expect my job to bring me peace.  If I can make more money, or find a job I like more, then I’ll be happy.  Or, if I can make more money, I’ll be able to buy more stuff.  And in my mind, more stuff will bring me peace.

Teaching Them Through My Struggles

If I’ve struggled (and continue to struggle) with looking for peace in all the wrong places, then I know my adult children will probably struggle too.  The best thing I can do for them is to pray that they find peace in God.  

1 Peter 5:7 says, “Give all your worries and cares to God, for He cares about you.”  Chris and I have always tried to live by example, especially when it comes to our kids.  We both let them know we struggle with putting our trust in God at times.  But, we also show them that our moments of true peace have come from Him.  

1 Peter 5:7
1 Peter 5:7

Releasing Your Grown Child to Learn What’s Important in Life

As our children grow into adults, we have less and less control over their lives.  This is natural and expected, but it’s still HARD for the mom in me to accept at times.  Sometimes, I need to spend time praying for my adult children to learn what’s important in life.  And I also have to release them into the care of God.  

At the end of the day, I need to be sure I’ve taught my kids these two important truths Jesus shared in Matthew 22:  “… ‘You must love the Lord your God with all your heart, all your soul, and all your mind…’  A second is equally important, ‘Love your neighbor as yourself.’”  Matthew 22: 37, 39.  Then I need to trust Him to continue working in their lives.  


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